Making friends
Initiating, joining play, social entry
The child who hovers at the edge of the group. The one who wants connection but doesn't know how to break in. Watching your kid struggle to make friends is painful - and knowing how to help without making it worse is tricky.
What to Know
Making friends requires skills that don't come naturally to all kids: reading social cues, initiating conversations, joining play already in progress, and recovering from rejection. Some kids dive into social situations easily. Others hang back, unsure how to break in or terrified of getting it wrong.
For kids who struggle, the problem usually isn't motivation — they want friends. It's know-how. They might not know how to approach a group, what to say, or how to respond when things don't go smoothly. Social entry is a skill that can be taught, practiced, and scaffolded.
Watching your child struggle socially is painful, and the instinct to intervene is strong. But hovering or doing the social work for them can backfire. Kids need coaching and supported practice, not rescue.
Signs to Watch
- •Hovers at the edge of groups without joining
- •Plays alone even when other kids are available
- •Doesn't know how to initiate or join play
- •Has few or no reciprocal friendships
- •Gets rejected but doesn't know why
- •Wants friends but seems unable to make them
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Activities & Worksheets
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Downloadable activities and worksheets for this topic.