Conflict resolution

Disagreements, problem-solving with peers

The screaming match over who had it first. The grudge that lasted all day. The inability to work anything out without adult intervention. Conflict resolution is a skill most adults still struggle with - kids need a lot of practice.

What to Know

Conflict resolution is hard enough for adults — for kids, it requires skills they're still developing: impulse control, perspective-taking, emotional regulation, and problem-solving under stress. When conflict erupts, most kids go straight to fight, flight, or freeze. Using words and finding solutions requires a level of composure that's hard to access in the moment.

Kids who struggle with conflict often know what they're supposed to do when calm. The problem is accessing that knowledge when emotions are running high. This is why practicing conflict resolution during calm moments is more effective than lecturing during or after a fight.

The goal isn't kids who never fight — that's unrealistic and actually deprives them of practice. It's kids who can move through conflict and come out the other side with the relationship intact.

Signs to Watch

•Fights escalate quickly
•Can't resolve disagreements without adult help
•Resorts to physical aggression during conflicts
•Holds grudges or brings up old conflicts
•Struggles to see the other person's side
•Either dominates conflicts or completely caves

Stories

Sorry's Not Enough (But It's a Start)

Milo said something mean. He apologized. But sorry wasn't enough—he had to show up, day after day, and prove he meant it.

Even Superheroes Need Sidekicks

Max tried to do everything himself. Carry all the groceries. Finish the puzzle alone. Fight the bully by himself. His friend Elena showed him: even heroes need help.