Potty training
Readiness, accidents, and the journey to independence
The pressure to potty train early. The accidents. The regression. The child who pees on the potty but refuses to poop. Potty training is a milestone that looms large — but pushing before they're ready makes everything harder. This isn't about your timeline. It's about theirs.
What to Know
Potty training is one of the few developmental milestones parents can't force. Unlike walking or talking, which happen on their own schedule, potty training requires cooperation — and cooperation requires readiness. Physical readiness (bladder control), cognitive readiness (understanding the process), and emotional readiness (willingness to try) all need to align.
Most children are ready somewhere between 18 months and 3 years, with the average around 27 months. But "average" doesn't mean "should be." Early training isn't better training. Children who train when truly ready often train quickly and smoothly. Children pushed before they're ready often struggle longer.
The pattern to watch for: resistance that feels like defiance but is actually unreadiness. The child who screams at the sight of the potty, who was trained and then regressed, who will pee but not poop — these aren't behavior problems. They're signs that something in the process needs adjustment.
Signs to Watch
- •Stays dry for 2+ hours at a time or wakes dry from naps
- •Shows awareness of peeing or pooping (pauses, hides, tells you)
- •Can follow simple instructions and communicate basic needs
- •Shows interest in the toilet, underwear, or what others do in the bathroom
- •Dislikes wet or dirty diapers and wants to be changed
- •Is in a generally cooperative phase (not peak defiance)
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