Trying new things
Courage, stepping outside comfort zone
"I don't want to." "I won't be good at it." "What if I mess up?" Some kids charge into new experiences. Others need significant runway and reassurance. Neither is wrong - but watching your child hold back from life is hard.
What to Know
Some kids charge into new experiences. Others need significant runway. Neither is wrong, but watching your child hold back from life — from activities they might enjoy, experiences that could expand them — is hard. The refusal often looks like stubbornness or disinterest, but underneath is usually fear.
Fear of failure is the most common culprit. Kids who worry about not being good at something avoid trying so they never have to find out. Fear of the unknown runs a close second — the uncertainty of new situations feels intolerable, so avoidance feels safer.
Pushing too hard usually backfires, creating power struggles and reinforcing avoidance. But accommodating completely — letting kids skip everything that feels scary — doesn't help either. The middle path is scaffolded bravery: small steps, supported exposure, and celebrating the try rather than the outcome.
Signs to Watch
- •Says "I don't want to" before knowing what it is
- •Worries about not being good at new things
- •Needs extensive reassurance before trying anything new
- •Has rigid interests and resists expanding them
- •Would rather not try than risk failure
- •Asks excessive questions about what will happen
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