Persistence

Grit, not giving up, sticking with hard things

The project abandoned halfway through. The "I can't do it" after one try. The talent that never develops because effort feels bad. Persistence isn't about personality - it's a skill that can be built.

What to Know

Persistence isn't a personality trait — it's a skill that can be built. When kids give up easily, it's usually because effort feels bad and they don't yet trust that pushing through leads anywhere. They've learned that quitting brings immediate relief, which is more compelling than a distant maybe-success.

The ability to stick with hard things requires frustration tolerance, a belief that effort matters, and enough past experience of pushed-through struggles paying off. Kids who haven't had that experience don't have the evidence to support persistence. They need to build it through small wins.

Praise for effort over outcome helps, but only if the praise is genuine and specific. Empty "good try!" doesn't build persistence. What works: acknowledging the specific effort, naming what was hard, and helping kids notice their own progress over time.

Signs to Watch

•Gives up quickly when things get hard
•Says "I can't" before really trying
•Avoids challenges to prevent failure
•Gets frustrated and quits rather than problem-solving
•Doesn't seem to connect effort with improvement
•Has started and abandoned many activities

Stories

For Zara, From Zara

Zara writes a letter to her future self. 'I know things are hard. But I've been through hard before, and I made it. You will too.'

The Girl Who Fell Off and Climbed Back On

Mira fell off her bike—hard. She didn't want to try again. The ground was scary now. But the bike was still there, waiting. One day, she decided: the fall wasn't the end of the story.

I've Got This

Hard things happen. Zoe's ice cream falls. Her friend moves away. She doesn't make the team. Each time, she finds her words: 'This is hard. I'm sad. And I've got this.'

Almost, Almost, Almost!

Eli is building something special, but it keeps falling apart. 'ALMOST!' he yells, ready to quit. His dog nudges him outside. After a walk, he sees it differently—and tries one more time.

I Don't Want to Clean My Room

Alex ran away from cleaning. He hid at the park, at his friend's, at grandma's. But everywhere he went, messes followed. Finally he went home and did it. It only took ten minutes.

Through the Storm for You

Mom was too sick to deliver the package. So Lily went—through wind, through rain, through scary and hard. She did it not because it was easy, but because she loved her mom.

The High Slide

Nina has watched the high slide all summer. Today, she climbs. Her legs shake. Her tummy flips. Dad waits at the bottom. One breath. She goes.

Articles

Growth Mindset for Kids: Teaching Children That Abilities Can Develop

How to help your child see challenges as opportunities rather than threats.

Helping Your Child Handle Failure and Disappointment

Building resilience when things don't go as planned.

Building Resilience: Raising Kids Who Can Bounce Back

What resilience really is and how to nurture it.

Activities & Worksheets

Activities coming soon

Downloadable activities and worksheets for this topic.