Death of loved one

Grandparent, family member, processing death

There's no right way to help a child through this. The questions are hard, the feelings are big, and you're likely grieving too. Kids need honesty, presence, and permission to feel whatever they feel.

What to Know

There's no right way to help a child through losing someone they love. The questions are hard, the feelings are big, and you're likely grieving too. Kids need honesty, presence, and permission to feel whatever they feel — even when their feelings don't match what you expect.

Children's understanding of death develops over time. Young kids may not grasp that death is permanent and may ask repeatedly when the person is coming back. Older kids understand permanence but may struggle with the "why" of it all. Both need patient, repeated conversations as they process.

What helps: honest, age-appropriate answers (it's okay to say "I don't know"); including kids in rituals if they want to be included; maintaining routines; watching for signs they need more support; and being willing to revisit the topic as they grow and their understanding deepens.

Signs to Watch

•Prolonged grief that interferes with daily life
•Significant changes in behavior, mood, or functioning
•Intense anxiety about other loved ones dying
•Regression or acting much younger
•Refusing to talk about the death or the person
•Guilt, self-blame, or magical thinking about causing the death

Stories

Me Too, Actually

When Jamal admitted he was scared, he expected laughter. Instead: 'Me too.' 'Same.' 'I still sleep with a nightlight.' He wasn't alone after all.

Articles

When a Pet Dies: Helping Children Through Their First Major Loss

Supporting your child through the death of a beloved pet.

Helping Children Cope with the Death of a Loved One

Guiding your child through grief and loss.

Activities & Worksheets

Activities coming soon

Downloadable activities and worksheets for this topic.